A Word or Two On Steven Moffat's Who

So, my first posts on this blog came about a year ago, on the subject of Doctor Who.  That wasn't my original intent.  But after the semi-hiatus of the split series, the excitement of the 50th anniversary, and the prospect of a new darker Doctor, to be played by an older actor, in a throwback to Hartnell, my anticipation was very high.  And the 2014 series frankly...sucked.  Instead of plunging this new Doctor headlong into new adventures, Steven Moffat squandered an entire year's worth of Doctor Who on pointless psychodrama and an utterly uninteresting love-triangle of sorts between the Doctor, Clara, and fuckin' Danny Pink.  Clara (a character who had already outstayed her welcome, Moffat having inserted her egotistically into the backstory of every single Doctor) started out in the first story childishly whining about the Doctor looking old and having wrinkles, and it took a whole series, before she got over her hangups with the Doctor's change, and before we had the chance to even start on proper stories for the Doctor's new actor, one Peter Capaldi.  Granted, the series did have its good moments here & there, but overall, for me, there was much more bad than good, and the whole thing is something of a write-off in my mind.  And then that fucker Moffat backtracked on the plans to write out Clara Oswald, more than a year too late already, with the Christmas-special, which I otherwise quite enjoyed...

A whole years' worth of Who down the toilet.  The show turned into a parody of itself, with the already over-hyped companion elevated to primary prominence, and the Doctor at one point reduced to the figure of a whimpering child, needing Clara's comforting hand to help stanch his tears.  Vomit !

Fast-forward to 2015, and this last series has been...yes...better.  With Danny Pink out of the picture (maybe), less focus on Coal Hill (don't worry, Moffat has a whole spinoff in the works for all of the five or so fans asking for that) & on Clara's psychological hangups, we almost got a decent series.  Of course, Moffat still did way too much of the writing himself, and much of the writing was sub-par.  Of course, Clara was still the egotistical greedy bossy attention-whore she ever was.  And a move away from single-episode stories was marred by the fact that the second story almost always inevitably fell short of the promise of the first.  But it wasn't wall-to-wall shite...

I watched last year every Saturday, desperately hoping & praying that the series would finally start to come together, and every time disappointed.  This year, I had much lower expectations, but still couldn't avoid those hopes, avoid getting emotionally invested in the outcome.  And if nothing else, I had Clara (finally) getting written out of the show to look forward to.  The whack-you-over-the-head foreboding of Clara's leaving was dragged out story after story, till finally, finally, in 'Face the Raven', she died.  But actually, no, Moffat lied to us.  Just as he did last year.  Just as he always does.

No, we find in the finale of the 2015 series, that Saint Clara cheats death after all.  A final fuck-you from Mister Moffat to all of the Clara-haters.  Alongside a fuck-you to all of the critics of the idea of a female Doctor, as he sought to finally enshrine the notion of gender-swapping Timelords.  And a fuck-you to all those who criticised the centrality of Saint bloody Clara, and the diminishment of the character of the Doctor, as we watched the Doctor ready to destroy the entire fucking universe for the sake of fucking Saint bloody Goddess of all Fandom Clara fucking Oswald, the Almighty !  But we're to believe that the other Timelords (including a resurrected Rassilon, brought back for fuck me if I know what reason) are the real monsters, right ?  Not the terrorist who is willing to destroy all of creation in the name of Clara the Exalted One ?...  Oh, and by the way, that crap about the Doctor + Clara being the hybrid teased throughout the series was one of the cheapest copouts ever.  Are you fucking me Moffat ?

I like Jenna Coleman.  I like Peter Capaldi.  I used to like, and still have some smidgen of respect for Steven Moffat.  But the man should have been gone years ago.  His ego has run wild the last few years, as he has rewritten the entirety of Doctor Who canon in his own image, largely via his alter-ego, the vastly over-rated and ultimately underwhelming character of Clara.  He's attempting to box in future 'show-runners', writers, and producers into his vision of Doctor Who, and his alone.  Not that of the older fans, not that of the younger, not that of all the producers and writers who came before (including Saint RTD, he of the ill-conceived idea of a 'Time War'), and not that of any who come after.  Doctor Who henceforth is to be Steven Moffat's Doctor Who™, and anyone who disagrees can go to hell.

And he'll get away with it.  Already is.  Already has.  Most of the fanboys daren't criticisise him.  Most of the actors, writers, producers, etc. who worked on Who in the past dating back to the 'sixties won't criticise him.  For that matter, they rarely, if ever, have the courage to criticise any aspect of Nu-Who or related projects, such as the works of Big Finish, whatsoever.  For many of them, it's their bread & butter, so in that regard, I can't blame them.  And many of those who were most critical of Moffat and his ridiculous elevation of the Clara character probably stopped watching last year (did I mention the ratings ?), or if they watch still, don't care enough to complain or criticise any more.

I'm rapidly falling into the latter category, already was in fact before this latest series.  This whole rant here is, I suppose, a matter of catharsis, more than anything else.


The Five Stages of Grief:

1. Denial  Split series, Anniversary*
2. Anger  Last year
3. Bargaining  N/A really
4. Depression  Last year to this
5. Acceptance  Current moment

And why should I care really ?  When the show came back in 2005 under Russell T Davies, there was so much I didn't like/disagreed with, and I was so much more invested in the Who of Big Finish (before much of their output went to shite.  Yeah, I said it), that I was willing to write off this new Who as a different product for a different generation.  Even as David Tennant took over from the ill-cast Eccleston, as some of the writing got better, as the show got closer to its roots, and further away from farting aliens and the likes of Cassandra (ugh,  Zoë, you deserve so much better).  Even as RTD, he of the ill-conceived idea of a 'Time War', finally left, to make way for a new 'show-runner.'  And then that evil bastard Moffat introduced me to wee Amelia Pond, and her 'Raggedy Man', and I wanted to believe again.  Fucking shite !

Here's my (generous) off-the-cuff ratings for the stories this year.  Probably the first time I've ever done this, and, almost certainly the last.

1. The Magician's Apprentice (6/10)  Great imagery, Missy was superb, sets up an intriguing cliffhanger.  Enough already with the fucking guitar !
2. The Witch's Familiar (7/10)  Needs more Missy !  Clara in the Dalek-casing closest I ever got to caring about Clara, since probably when she was a governess.
3. Under the Lake (9/10)  Closest to scary as the series got, great suspense, chilling ending.
4. Before the Flood (4/10) And then this utter shite.  Absurd monster, comedy alien, and all the nonsense about bootstrap-parodoxes aside, makes no logical sense whatsoever.  Even the Doctor basically admits as much at the end.
5. The Girl Who Died (4/10)  This idiotic nonsense would be the throwaway of the series, except it gets us invested in the idea of Ashildr, the ever-hyped 'Hybrid' of the whole series.  Except...she isn't.
6. The Woman Who Lived (3/10)  Ditto.  The question of fitting infinite life into finite human memory was clever & poignant.  Otherwise, this was pointless utterly missable filler.
7. The Zygon Invasion (5/10)  Well, the whole idea of Britain voluntarily admitting masses of Zygons was nonsensical, every single character behaved irrationally throughout, and the thing reeked to high heaven of political correctness, but it was well filmed and augured well for...
8. The Zygon Inversion (3/10) The Doctor in a Union-Flag bedecked parachute a la James Bond !  Should have shut off then.  And the Doctor's great speech ?  Preachy pablum and platitudes.  I struggled to stay awake, it was so boring.  Supposedly, this was the moment that Capaldi came into his own as the Doctor.  Bullshit.
9. Sleep No More (8/10)  Didn't care for or fully understand this on first viewing.  It rewards a second viewing, and I applaud Gatiss for the experiment.  Didn't quite work out in practice, but one of the boldest efforts of the series.
10. Face the Raven (5/10)  Who the fuck actually wanted Rigsy back ?  Really, who are you ?  And Why ?!!  But we got to finally see Saint Clara die ! (kinda, sorta, not really...)
11. Heaven Sent (8/10)  This is the kind of experimental story that really belongs in fan-fiction, or an audio, rather than on the teevee.  Interesting, but not entirely original idea.  Bit too obvious premise, and dragged out to anoyance towards the end.  Capaldi excellent as always, almost no Clara, and best CGI of the series, the moving walls of the castle aside.**
12. Hell Bent (3/10)  Very cinematic direction and effects.***  Liked the parts w/Peter & Jenna in the diner.  Otherwise, this was the very epitome of everything I hate about Steven Moffat and what he has done/is doing to Doctor Who.  Perfect end to the series in that regard.  Managed to refrain throwing my remote.

* I liked An Adventure in Space and Time.  Moffat to the best of my knowledge had nothing to do with it.

** They made this work in Harry Potter, and the rest of your CGI is excellent.  Why was this so ridiculously fake ?

*** Meant to say something here; can't remember what now.  Aw, fuck it.


Update: xx. The Husbands of River Song (4/10) Greg Davies was cool, Matt Lucas alright, wrapped up some of the threads of River Song's story, and had some decent one-liners.  Other dialogue was cringe-worthy, story was shit, made no sense, and bored me to tears.  More useless filler, justified largely on the basis on fan-service, rather than telling compelling interesting stories.  Next...