Dear Supermarkets/Grocery Stores

Could you please stop going out of your way to make shopping at your locations even more actively painful than it already was ?  Is it not bad enough that you go out of the way in the physical geography of the shops/stores to maximise the time customers have to spend per visit, with the most frequently bought items physically separated by the greatest distance ?  Not bad enough that you intentionally place products like tooth- and brain-rotting sugary products at children's eye-level ?

Is it not bad enough that your customers have to deal with a) persistent understaffing at peak hours, b) annoying Christmas music for several months of the year during the 'holiday season', c) carts/trolleys for 'junior shoppers/customers', so that other people's spawn can take up that much more of the aisle space as they weave this way and that with their mini-carts like drunken octaganerians (on the positive side, at least they're not then rushing backwards and fowards down the aisles, like they're in some kind of carnival competition), d) the persistent under-provisioning of the more useful smaller carts, as if every shopper represents the cast of Just the Ten of Us, e) shitty parking structures, that force one to enter/exit and park at awkward angles, f) persistently malfunctioning self-service machines, g) those EVIL EVIL EVIL 'loyalty' campaigns, that impose artificially higher prices on those unwilling to sell their souls to Marketing Satan, and so many other nasty horrible evil practices ?

But no, every aisle has to also be blocked with a cart filled with discounted produce, with a special advertising display, with a stupid cardboard cutout smiling inanely at us.  We have to put up with already congested aisles being reduced many times to the width of a single cart so that you can prolong our shopping misery that little bit longer in the vain hope that we'll spend that little bit more at your evil establishment.  Well, FUCK YOU !

And while we're at it, no I didn't find everything I was looking for today, but, no, I'm not going to tell you about it, because a) You don't give a shit, b) You can't do anything about your establishment's stocking policy, c) the reason I couldn't find the product has nothing to do with any magical advantage you have in locating products on the shelves over me, and d) Fuck you, leave me alone !  I know it's not you.  I know it's your evil Fascist cocksucking corparatist overlords.  That's why I lie when you ask me if I found everything I wanted today.  Why I lie when you ask me how I'm doing.  Why I'd lie about just about anything that wouldn't get in the way of my getting my fucking purchase done, and my arse out of your wretched establishment a second earlier.

And to think, our right-wing establishment politicians would have us believe that the 'free market' is all about efficiency, and that it smoothly and effortlessly rewards and punishes players according to the best accordance with customer needs and demands.  Well, if you keep in mind that the only 'customers' that truly matter are those making purchases in the millions and billions, perhaps.  Otherwise, pull another one.